My mother is talented. Really, really talented.

She has a voice that puts Sleeping Beauty to shame

and an absolutely magical touch with the ivories

you name a tune and she breaks into the most beautiful rendition of it

sans sheet music

I took piano when I was a girl

I hated it

My four siblings and I each had a dish night

It was my night to do dishes and I swore that if she made me wash them

I'd quit taking piano

forever

{echo, echo, echo}

I had to do the dishes

Now, every day is my dish day

and I can't play a lick of piano

I sure showed her

wah ha ha

{evil laughter}

There was a rule at my house that we had to be

taking a musical instrument at all times,

a difficult undertaking for those of us that couldn't carry a tune in a pail.

After the great piano debacle I picked up the flute.

In case you didn't know, there are "chairs" in band,

"first chair" being the most talented.

I was last chair.

The poor band director finally moved me to percussion

but we need not relive that painful part of history.